I was listening to some Ozzy today and while I don’t count myself as a really big fan, sometimes I do like his work, although it’s probably something that I’d change the channel on because I’ve heard Iron Man way to many times and it really bores me almost as much as the movie, in which there is no relation to the song, but Jeff Bridges had a good part in it, but then again, I usually like everything that Jeff Bridges does because he is not only one of the greatest actors of our time but he was also the Dude…either that or he’s almost Hollywood royalty and he’s smart enough to pick out the great roles from the really horrible roles by now but then again who can remember Starman because I surely don’t or at least I wouldn’t admit to it because I didn’t see the film nor did I see Tron: Legacy or R.I.P.D either because I heard they were that bad and Jeff Bridges’ allure alone wouldn’t get me to pay to see that crap…or so I’ve heard.
This really isn’t about Jeff Bridges though because it’s really about Ozzy but somehow that got me on a tangent about JB and I don’t mean Jack Black, because he’s done a lot of shit too and also made a movie about shit disappearing which I think it’s safe to say was a biopic, as sometimes we hope he would disappear too.
Just so we all can get back on track, this is not about either of the JB’s even though one is maybe kind of funny if you go for crap that your corporate overlords think you should find funny and the other sometimes gets a great part that people you’ve never heard of submit for an Oscar, and he wins because you spend 2 hours waiting for him to deliver that 2 minute monologue (that some insignificant someone wrote) but JB (and not the other one) makes a statement about the way we humans are, which makes a lot of sense, and is beautifully delivered because it is being said by a great actor, but is quickly forgotten because, alas, it’s just a movie and we all can’t separate fact from fiction without a little help from our friends in Hollywood.
Our friends in Hollywood make their living on re-telling timeless tales about things that others thought of first. That is the current trend as nobody has an original thought anymore. I’d love to tell you all about the new 2015 Tucker Torpedo that I saw driving down the road, today but I can’t because I didn’t see it, probably because there is no 2015 Tucker out right now because big 3 (or should I say not so Big Three these days) put Preston Tucker out of business in the late ’40’s because he dared to dream and make a better product than they did.
Out of all the miles I drove today, I didn’t see a 1948 Tucker either but at the very least, I know that those are a rarity and a collectors item by now because there’s only about 48 of them out there and those in existence go for about a million bucks a piece, that is if you can find one that the current owner wants to sell. Perhaps we should ask George Lucas if he wants to sell his but I doubt that he does. At current, his ’48 Tucker is a collectors item, kind of like the toys made by Kenner in the early 80’s are but they will never be worth as much as the car because of supply and demand.
I’m not really sure how much demand for a brand new Tucker Torpedo there is today but I’m sure someone with a little bit of capital will eventually make an investment trying to capitalize on the current retro trend. I would strongly advise against that but who am I anyway? Trust me, somebody else is thinking about this right now and they will pitch their idea very soon because nobody has an original thought anymore and that somebody will find another somebody who has a lot of venture capital to invest and they’ll try to do this and it will fail because I know that I’m sick of seeing re-boots and I’m starting to think you all are too.
Besides that, George Lucas’s Tucker belongs in a museum just as all the other Tucker’s do. It (the car, dumbass) is of a time gone by and needs a building to showcase it. As I’ve been saying for so many years, Chicago needs another museum and preferably one that makes the lakefront and skyline look worse than it did. The Chicago Skyline was once beautiful and the envy of the world but you all know that just when you think it’s perfect, it’s time to really fuck it up and we can all thank the Rahm-father for that and Rahm is somehow tied to Barry Soetoro as he was his chief of staff but who the hell knows about Barry Soetoro anyway? I suppose that I’ll discuss Barry Soetoro at a later date, but that time is not now because this is about Ozzy, and as far as I know he should be canonized right next to Saint Nikki of whom you all might not be familiar with but nevertheless deserves his place in Rock History in which JB should have taught us more about and maybe someday will if some Hollywood types decide to make a sequel to School of Rock, but that has nothing to do with JB, the Dude, who starred in Tucker: a Man and His Dream, directed by, you guessed it, George Lucas.
What does this have to do with Ozzy, you ask? The answer is: ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!
That’s right. Nothing. Reverend Doctor Cyndi has completely wasted a few minutes of your time and you liked it, so don’t complain because I really don’t care about you, and won’t until the time in which you stand up and tell the world that you’re pissed off too…just like I am.